How Prayer and Patience Led Me to my Future Wife

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Since my early twenties I had a strong desire to have a wife and (possibly) a family of my own.  Looking back on my life in my twenties and even my early thirties I can see now that I was not ready at all!  Thank you Lord for your timing! With that said, that doesn’t mean that I didn’t have my share of heart ache and super lonely times. It doesn’t mean I never wondered if God was really listening to me or if He even cared about me and my desires.  In my twenties I dated a lot of ladies and there was always that question in the back of my mind “Is she the one”?  Is this the lady that I was going to spend the rest of my life with?  Sometimes I found out pretty quickly that it was not meant to be and I ended it but other times I really thought that I had found “the one” and I ended up heart broken. The times that I got my heart broken were pretty intense, sometimes lasting for several months.  My parents divorced when I was four years old and I never really understood how damaged and hurt I was from the divorce until I was a grown man and would go through yet another break up.  When a relationship would end it would totally re-open all of the hurt and the wounds that were caused by my parents’ divorce. I never even really knew those wounds existed.  It was agonizing for me!  I went into a deep dark hole of loneliness and rejection several times for many months. I was still same ole Solomon (easy to talk to and fun loving) but deep down I was seriously hurting!  In my early thirties I was tired of playing games and tired of the same ole dating nonsense.  I decided I wasn’t going to pointlessly date any more, I was really going to just wait for “the one”.  An old friend of mine told me about how he did a Daniel Fast to spend time in prayer with God about finding his wife and it sparked something inside of me.  That next week I started my very first Daniel Fast.  Fruit, vegetables and water only for 21 days.  During that time, I prayed very specific prayers for my future wife.  I prayed for a Godly woman that was genuinely kind, loved music, enjoyed the outdoors, and that would be just as beautiful inside as she was on the outside.  I even prayed that she might be an Arkansas girl (since I’m from Arkansas and Christmases would just be easier with families and stuff).  Like I said, I was very specific about these prayers.  This fast was in June of 2015.  Soon after that I met a Christian girl and we “quote on quote” dated for maybe two months, nothing serious but I was starting to have some feelings for her.  I took a trip to Iceland with my brother and some friends and when I returned this girl announced on Facebook that she had officially started dating someone else, totally out of the blue.  It threw me for a loop. I wasn’t even totally sold on this girl and we were not exclusive, but all of sudden all of those feelings of rejection came right back!  It really hurt me to my core.  I mean I had just spent 21 days seeking God on this and here I was right back to square one all over again.  About a year went by and I decided to do the fast again and to seek God about this subject.  By this time I was 35 and still single with no prospects.  When I was 30 I told my mother that if I was still single by 35 I would do online dating.  I had two months left before I turned 36 so I signed up for .  Within two weeks of being on the site I was messaging back in forth with this beautiful woman with the screen name “Ilikebigbundts”  HA!We started texting and decided to grab dinner.  She went to a church called Nashville Life and we decided to meet up after she got out of church (Christian. CHECK).  While we were eating I noticed that she was very kind and considerate in a genuine way (CHECK). I found out that she loved the outdoors and several months earlier had hiked Half Dome in Yosemite!!!  Wow! (CHECK)  I found out that she went to USC in California for film score and could conduct an orchestra (major wow, and a major CHECK on the music thing).  She was so beautiful and I loved her hair!  I’m cheesy I know. (beautiful. CHECK)  And then all of a sudden she told me that she was from Arkansas. (CHECK).  I knew that there was something different with her. It wasn’t like I knew right then that she was my girl, but something was just different with her.  Shortly after we started dating seriously and it quickly became obvious to both of us that we were totally in love with each other.  I bought an engagement ring and asked her to marry  me in a hot air balloon and she said YES! The hot air balloon was how I always envisioned proposing since I was in high school and little did I know that she had always dreamed about being proposed to in a hot air balloon.  Aidan and I are currently planning our wedding and we can’t wait to be married this November. God truly hears us and knows the desires of our hearts.  It might take a while for our prayers to be answered but be specific, be patient, and continue to pray.                 

Lucy HowardComment